The Edness of Haruhi Suzumiya
by Mekoblank18
Summary: Another scam goes wrong for the Eds once again. But this time, It leads them on adventure in a new country. How will the Eds survive and what will happen when a certain brigade is aware of their presense?
1. Falling into the Unknown

Chapter 1 – Falling into the Unknown

**Hello, Mekoblank18 here submitting his first fanfic...ever. I'm hoping (and I say hoping) to get quite far on this one, so be kind and no death threats please, I already have 18 and 11 are from me. Yes, I am a little insane, but never mind, enjoy the fic.**

"_Life is a completed enigma; it has so many different viewpoints which in turn strand out to begin a series of complex eternal questions. I think it is basic instinct to discover and journey into the unknown, think ideas that have never been thought, combine things together in hope that it will work out. Hopefully I too, will venture into the wondrous world in hope for knowledge, understanding and wisdom, perhaps even..."_

"DOUBLE D, SNAP OUT OF IT WILLYA. YOU'RE SLOUCHING ON YOUR WORK"

Double D was forcefully yanked from his inspiring daydream and slammed right back onto the face of reality thanks to his tone-death short tempered friend, who was in a state of fury and impatience combined.

"ED, Speed it up down there otherwise this scam will have to wait until tomorrow and I hate those 3 words put together in a sentence like that!" screamed Eddy at the top of his powerful lungs

Ah Yes, Once again, The 3 Eds spent another warm Mid-July Day to carry another 'flawless' scam. This time, it was a Journey to the Centre of the Earth scam where Eddy, manipulative as his is, bribed poor Ed into digging the vertical underground tunnel in hopeless efforts of finding the Mole People...loveable oaf.

"Eddy, I see no sign of the Mole People or their Quantum-Powered Terraforma Energy Manipulator Cannon that could turn our major cities into smouldering cinders, like in Revenge of the Intergalactic Used-Car Salesmen #37." called Ed as it echoed in the seemingly endless tunnel, drifted thousands of miles upwards towards the surface.

"Just keep digging, Lumpy and you Sock-head, keep working on that passenger capsule" shouted Eddy pointing at Double D as his head was hidden by the gaping hole in the middle of the cul-de-sac he was bending over.

As Ed replied with his much-loved "Dig-a-hole" chant, Double D continued on his work, but still immersed in his thoughts. The capsule was egg-shaped and could hold barely 6 people, though it's meant for 4. It was made from random rubbish for the junkyard included scrapped car frames, wood remaining from their rollercoaster scam, even Eddy's hardboiled egg maker met its maker for this scam to exist. The capsule was attached to a wooden harness which branched onto 4 stands each on one side of the hole

"This scam is going me richer than I thought my wildest dreams with our Super-Duper Ed-arific Journey to the Centre of the Earth scam, the kids was pay plenty to ride this new baby" said Eddy with smirk on his face that put the Grinch to shame. Double D sighed on in desolation and put the finishing touches on the capsule's outer shell. "At long last" Double D sighed to himself as he guided the capsule over the hole by turned a series of dials and cranks, "The containment capsule is complete and standing by, Eddy"

"About time too" grumbled Eddy as he turned his head towards Double D and back towards the hole "Hey Monobrow, that's deep enough, you can stop now" shouted Eddy.

"OK, Eddy" said a voice behind him.

Eddy jumped in the air with fright and almost fell in, but in a rare streak of luck, grabbed the side of the hole. He looked up to find Ed looking back at him with his trademark goofy grin

"ED, where did you come from, more importantly how did you get out of the hole so fast?" said a confused Eddy.

"Ahh, Some things are best left uneaten, Eddy" said the dimmest Ed. Eddy crawled out of the hole and slapped Ed with such a force that Ed's head spun faster than a washing machine on steroids. Ed giggled insanely until his rotating head slowed to a stop, "Ha Ha Ha, Oh Yeah, Look what I found" Ed cheered as he pulled a full-size dinosaur skeleton from out of his jacket to full cartoon-like manner and held it above his head.

"Why Ed, You've just uncovered a full-sized _Bambiraptor_ from the Cretaceous Era" said Double D in delight as he took out his magnifying glass "Did you know that this specimen is around 75 Million Years old. Ed, this is Amazing".

"T'weren't nothing" chuckled Ed as he threw the skeleton structure over the head, across the street and crashed though Rolf's window to which he replied after poking his head out of the shattered glass

"Who threw this shrivelling up thing-me-majibber that resembles Rolf's Great Nano's Prize Prunes...ED BOYS" shrieked Rolf as he jumped through his already broken window as rolled towards the unfortunate Eds, but stopped as he almost hit Kevin while he was riding along the street on his bike.

"Hot-Shot Kevin, join me in crushing these Ed-boys like grapes inbetween Papa's toes." Said Rolf

"If it involves pounding those Dorks, I'm always in Rolf" said Kevin with an evil-catlike grin on his face

"RUN AWAY" shouted Double D and Eddy, but before they could accomplish that, Ed, terrified out his wits grabbed them both and threw them into the capsule along with himself afterwards and locked the door

"Good thinking Ed, I like to see them thick-heads get us in here" sighed Eddy as he made himself comfortable. Double D took this opportunity to check over the detail of the structure of the capsule, while Ed was...just being Ed.

"Cool, it's like being in an egg..a chicken egg, I am a little baby chicken ready to be hatched and fed chewed-up worms" shouted Ed in glee as he started to jump about.

"ED STOP" shouted Double D and Eddy together "You'll damage the steel frame of the shell"

But too little, too late, the rope from the harness broke, causing both the containment pod and the harness to collapse. Both Kevin and Rolf looked on into the hole as the 3 Eds were falling rapidly in their weird-looking craft screaming and shrieking (except for Ed, who was still in a state of ecstasy) until they were swallowed up by the dark abyss.

**So, basically if you haven't figured it out, (if you haven't and don't want to know, please cover your ears and shout LALALA, I'm not listening" in your loudest voice until a loved one comes into the room and slaps you) it's a crossover (Hooray!) between Ed, Edd n Eddy and The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. I haven't decided on pairings yet *dramatic voice* _I'm only a beginner, _I'll get back to you on that. Anyway, please review and hopefully next chapter will be up in the next week, Cheery-bye**


	2. The Calm before the Storm

**First of All, I forgot to put this in the first chapter, but I do not own Ed, Edd n Eddy or Haruhi Suzumiya or any of their characters, locations or otherwise, Secondly, thanks to those who have read and review. Hope this chapter satisfies you all. Anyways,onto the next chapter, a bit longer than ther last... allonsy**

Continuing from where we left of, the Eds were still plummeting down this seemly bottomless hole towards their infinite doom. It was about 15 minutes until Ed had stopped his singing and joined in with the screaming with the other two.

"What's happening Double D? Shouldn't we have crashed by now or burnt up or something?!?" Eddy screamed

"I have no clue, Eddy. I could be any second from now, I have no idea how far Ed dug" panicked Double D

Both of them turned to look at Ed, who had crawled into a foetal position, sucking his thumb and sweating violently. Just then, the capsule and its occupants started to glow red and shudder violently like a space shuttle re-entering earth's atmosphere

"THIS IS IT, GENTLEMEN, WE'RE BREAKING UP" yelled Double D

"I WANT MY MOMMY" cried Ed

"Cracks and dents started to form upon the wall of the capsule, the whole thing looked as though it would burst into flames any moment now. The Ed's were huddled in a corner, whimpering like wounded puppies, thinking this as their last moment on Earth and then...

BOOOM!, WHOOSSHH!!!

...silence

Double D opened a vigilant eye, but was almost blinded by the light shining from the outside the capsule.

"Is...is...is this Heaven? Stuttered Double D as he wearily rose to his feet and walked to toward the window. "Hmm, let's see now...blue sky...OK, clouds...right...a city below...chec...wait a moment, that's new." Double D then realized something as he started to smile and turned around to face his friends, hold on to each other for dear life.

"Fellows, come over here, we are alive and breathing" smiled Double D showing his gaping tooth space clearly

"Huh, what's the..." said a bewildered Eddy as he looked up see to a familiar face for the second time that day. "Arrrgggghhhhaaaa" croaked Eddy trying to push Ed away but instead pushes himself away due to Ed's giant body build "Get a shower when you have the chance, Stinky"

Ed ceased his shaking and blubbering enough himself to notice that he was still in one piece. "I'M ALIVE, EDDY. I'M A-LIVE" shouted a relieved Ed, as he picked up Eddy and threw him round like a ragdoll and started slamming him repeatedly on the floor, like Bamm-Bamm with his club. When Ed had finished, a bruised Eddy; still in Ed's godly grip, punched his dear friend with such force that his eyes disappeared back into head.

"I think I see my brain, Eddy" said Ed

"I surprised you can even see it, Burr head" mocked Eddy

"Fellows, please. Stop your bickering and look outside" said Double D. Doing as they were told...for once. Ed and Eddy joined Double D at the window for a look-see.

What they saw was astonishing...the whole craft seemed to be taking off into the sky, they saw a city below them, although the Ed's had never noticed a city like that anywhere near Peach Creek.

"Double D, I got 3 questions for you. 1, Where are we? 2, Why is the capsule in the sky? And 3, Where the HECK IS PEACH CREEK?" Yelled Eddy

"Eddy, please calm down. You've giving me an splitting headache" pleaded Double D as he rubbed his temple. He then turned to Ed. "Ed, Question for you. When you were digging your hole, where were you when you finished?"

"Ummmm, I forget" said Ed with a blank empty look on his face. Double D started to sigh until Ed interrupted him. "Nono, WAIT. I think I remembered. When I was dig-dig-digging, I finally thought I found the Mole People's secret underground lair, but instead it was an uppity-side down world, like in the Special Easter Edition Twilight Zone comic. I didn't know where I was, there was trees behind me and a road, but no cars, oh and a sign, but these words were all squiggly" Ed pondered. "And then, Eddy called me back and I did and when I got back, he hit me until my spun and then I..."

"OK Ed, Too Far, I think I now understand where we might be, Eddy" concluded Double D.

"Well, before you do that, Sock head, I have one more question" said Eddy with a worried look on his face.

"Yes Eddy" replied Double D

"Why are we floating" said Eddy

Eddy was right, all three of them and other random bits and bobs in the capsule were floating. Double D look outside to see the craft had stopping rising and started falling back down to Earth.

"Oh Dear, We may have survived the journey here, but I'm afraid that we may not live through the crash landing, Gentlemen" yelled Double D.

"WAIT" shouted Ed, "My brain is working" *In Ed's head, we see a monkey on a typewriter drinking banana beer*. Ed then grabs Eddy and crammed him into Double D's Hat with Double D still attached to it.

"No, Ed WAIT!!!" protested Double D, but to no avail. Ed pushed him upwards and himself in the sock hat like a protective cocoon (you know, like in cartoons lol).

As the capsule descended towards the ground, it ricocheted off two pine trees, taking then both down while cushioning the landing as it crashed on the nearby school track field; luckily it was still around two hours until the school started.

20 minutes ago

Kyon woke with a start as his mind was pierced by his annoying as hell alarm clock. After swatting it off his desk, switching it off and more-or-less breaking off, he looked at his phone with half-opened eyes.

"6.15, Damn, I thought I set it one hour later. Anyway, I better make a decision, I can either get out of bed, get ready, go to school and get physically and mentally tortured by Haruhi and her SOS Brigade today, or I can cut my wrists" he jokingly thought

Upon realising that he was starving, he forced himself out of bed and drudged himself downstairs to the kitchen. He took out a box of his favourite cereal, a bowl, and a carton of milk... scratch that, an empty of carton milk.

"Hells Bells" he sighed. "Oh well, Might as well head to the store, since I have extra time this morning. So, he grabbed his jacket and wallet, left a sticky note on the counter which read ("Away to the store for milk – Kyon") and left the house, shutting the door behind him.

The nearest store was 3 blocks away, just near this road that passes by the Kashiro woods, so I was not a problem getting there even if I was still half asleep. It was still dark, the moon and the stars were still visible, with the sun just creeping past the horizon, giving the sky and the clouds a reddish tint, as beautiful as it was, Kyon knew what to make of this.

"Red sky at night, shepherd's delight; red sky in the morning, shepherd's warning" Kyon concluded. "So this is the calm before the storm eh, hope Haruhi doesn't need another heater, I still ache from last time"

As Kyon entered the store, he started to think what would what be in store for him at school, today. Was he really looking forward to being Haruhi's manservant, running himself ragged for stupid tasks, watching Miss Asahina be forced to wear those ridiculous costumes, even if she does look fantastic in them, though she'd look good in anything. He also thought when he entered the clubroom, would he find Yuki in the corner reading her book as usual, barely moving an inch and saying more than 2 words in a sentence or Itsuki, with his goofy, annoying smile and his complicated sentence which he can barely understand. "Is this what I'm looking forward to today" he thought"

Truth was, he was in store for this...and more

"150 yen, please" said the shop-assistant, putting the milk in the carrier bag. Kyon handed him the money, received his change, thanked him, and left. It was brighter outside now, more of a bluish colour than red. "Hmm, let's hope the rain holds off until I get to school" he hoped".

He started to cross the road to his street when suddenly...

BOOOM, WHOOSSHH

Kyon almost jumped out of his skin as he staggered and fell onto the pavement. He quickly looked upwards to see a...egg-like thing rising from the woods and soaring towards the sky, smoke bellowed from underneath it. Kyon blinked his eyes a couple of times to check his eye-sight...nope, still there. Like a jet in the sky. He also could have sworn that he heard yelling from inside the object.

Kyon simply shrugged and walked towards his houses. After almost being killed by a former classmate and joining a club which contains an alien, a time-traveller, an esper and is commanded by God, incarnate, he started to think nothing else can surprise me anymore. "Oh man, today is going to be one long-ass day" Kyon sighed as he shut the door behind him.

**PHEW, I'm nickered after that. I'll have the next chapter up about Thursday or afterwards because that's when I finish college for the week. Please keep reviewing, *evil voice, I will appease me*. Anyway, unil then. Cherry-bye**


	3. Brave New World

**Chapter 3 – Brave New World**

**Merry Christmas, Everyone. I'm very sorry for the delay of the next chapter, I've just been so busy for the holidays and at long last, I have finally had the chance to watch Bleach and I have been hooked for the past few years. Anyways, Here is the next long awaited chapter. Enjoy**

"Any sign of those Dorks yet, Rolf" said Kevin looking over the hole with caution. He was shining a torch that he borrowed from his Dad's toolbox from the garage. Unfortunately, to no avail, the results were so far inconclusive.

"Not yet, Kevin" replied Rolf "This hole is darker than the inside of Bo-Bo"

"Uuaaggghh, the torch isn't faulty and the batteries are just new" Kevin groaned. "Geez, How far did those idiots dig?"

"Who knows" said Rolf in his creepy-tone voice "This thing is deeper than anything that Rolf has ever witnessed. They may have even probably reached the lair of the Great Yeshmiyek, she who lives at the centre of the Earth. At this very moment, she may be removing each of their eye-lashes and pouring hot beeswax onto their kneecaps."

Before Kevin could reply to that mind-boggling comment, they were approached by Johnny 2x4 with his trademark friend, Plank.

"Hey Guys, What's all the fuss about" he says as he moves between the other 2 taller lads. "Holy Moly, Plank. Look at the size of that burrow. The Gopher that dug that must have been the size of a pig".

"YOU FOOL" retaliated Rolf, screaming in Johnny's face. "Wilfred's not the one responsible for this."

"Rolfy's right, Johnny" said Kevin "It's those 3 idiots, Dork, Double Dork n Dorky scraping up another dead-beat scam which this time left then down the hole..."

"...where there are being tortured by the Great Yeshm..." Rolf interrupted

"Not helping, Man" interrupted Kevin, pushing Rolf away from him. "Point is...now those fools are stuck down that hole and we can't see any sign of them, which means we can't beat the crap out of them"

"Jeepers" said a slightly bewildered Johnny. "What's that, Plank...Plank says Good Riddance to Bad Artichokes."

"For once Johnny" sighed Kevin "I completely agree with you, besides the Football Finals will be airing soon, you coming Rolf".

"Rolf shall partake in your request; Kevin" Replied Rolf "Those Ed-Boys can just get their selves out.

Johnny looked to the hole and Kevin and back, unsure what to do. "Wait for me guys, Plank's is the mood for some rough sport" he finally said running towards Kevin's house.

Meanwhile....

On the track-field outside North High, the local High School, the smoke and dust started to settle. A multiply dented metal object started to emerge from the dust cloud, it was buckled beyond salvage and metal casing had been torn off in some places. Eventually, the whole capsule just crumpled apart with a groan and a series of clatters; among the debris was a large, lumpy and slightly scorched black sock hat. Suddenly, a pair of legs wearing blue pants and red sneakers started to emerge for the sock hat.

"Geez, Double D, your hat is indestructible like Ed, what the fabric made out of...Kevlar?" said Eddy trying pull himself out of the hat. Eventually, he finally freed himself, before staggering backwards and falling over a piece of debris falling flat on his back.

"No, Eddy" replied Double D "The fabric material is cotton, although I'm surprised as you are that we are still alive and that my hat piece is an portable impenetrable fortress." Double D chuckled at his own joke before stopped abruptly "Hold on a moment, Where's Ed?"

Just as Double D finished that sentence, Ed popped up from Double D shirt, their heads sitting next to Double D's and his right hand poking out of Double D's right sleeve. "DOUBLE D" shouted a ecstatic Ed, "Your Hat is SO cool, You should become a superhero, you can be "The Sock hat Supreme"...oh oh and you could your intelligence to build cool gadgets to enhance your Sock hat powers, sounds cool, huh"

"Oh yeah Ed. That sounds cool" said a dizzy Eddy sarcastically; still lying on back and his eyes spinning like mad "You could his sidekick, the HUMAN LUMP!!!

After the Eds had pulled themselves from the debris, Ed had calmed down, Eddy had regained his balance and Double D was about to speak.

"Now" he began "As I was about to say before we were interrupted by that unfortunate mishap, It seems that we've ended up somewhere far away from home.

"Where, Double D" said Ed.

"Well, Ed. Judging by the architecture of the building, the foreign scripture written on that building behind you" Eddy turned round and back again quickly. "And also, from what I saw of the area while in the air from the capsule, it seems that we are in the Land of the Rising Sun."

Ed and Eddy just blankly stared at him.

Double D sighed and held the top of his head with his thumb and forefinger and shook his head lightly. "Oh Goodness Sake, Eddy. WE'RE IN JAPAN; GOT IT, JAPAN IS WHERE WE ARE.

"Japan, Eh." Eddy Pondered "Rats, Where's Jimmy when you need him?"

"Double D, If this is Japan" said Ed "Where is Godzilla?"

Eddy smacked Ed on the side of his head. "Godzilla doesn't exist, he's only in the movies, you diddy"

"Yeah right" Ed mockingly laughed "Next thing you'll be saying Gigan and Gamura aren't real either.

As Ed and Eddy continued to bicker about the existence of fictional and non-fictional characters, Double D walked away to a quieter spot on the field. He sat on the biggest piece of debris that he thought wouldn't scuff his pants. He viewed his surroundings and observed the local school. It was open yet, because he noticed that no students were around, well, there was one.

It was a girl, a little older looking than him. She had purple-greyish hair, pale skin and a blank stare on her face as she walked towards the school. As Double D continued to watch her, the mysterious girl stopped and turned her head towards him and stared. Both of them met eyes for a few moments until the girl broke the contact and walked away.

**Right, Everyone. As soon as I get rid of this bleedin holiday cold, I'll start work of the next chapter. So, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year :)**


	4. Catalyst

Chapter 4 – Catalyst

_Finally, the next chapter is up. Sorry about the wait between now and Christmas. I get easily distracted, I got really into Bleach College work and don't get me started about my broken power adaptor and my friend, Blair and his mischief. Anyways, enough crap excuses. Here it is, sorry about the wait; I've missed you very much. :)_

_Also I should mentioned the age of the Eds in this story, which I've been meaning to do since the beginning, but my mind is like a boomerang, it flys off and comes back later._

_Ed – 15_

_Double D – 15 (Albeit a few months older than Ed)_

_Eddy – 14_

Eddy sighed, "Alright Ed, One more time…Bruce Willis is real, John McClane is from the Movie, Die Hard which was played by Bruce Willis".

Ed continued to stare blindly into nothingness.

"Now I'm really confused" said Ed before chuckling

"That's it, I'm killing you" said a frustrated Eddy. He picked up a metal pipe from the debris and was about to battered the brains (if he had any) out of Ed when Eddy stopped to notice Double D about 10 yards away.

Double D continued to stare blankly off into distance. He had been like that since he laid eyes on that girl in the distance; there was something peculiar about her. Her face looked very blank and very pale, "_Was she ill_" he thought. No, couldn't be, not with those eyes, those deep amber eyes of her so fascinating, so…beautiful, so…

Double D snapped back to reality as he noticed a chunk of mouldy blue-green cheese hovered a few inches under his nostrils

"YAAAACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKAHHHHHHH, GGGGGGUUUAAHHHHHGGGH"

Double D was taken aback by the ghastly, decaying smell and could have sworn he jumped back 8 feet.

"Finally, Einstein's back to Earth. Ed, that thing of yours could raise the dead" said Eddy

"Really" said Ed thoughtfully "Beware of Sheldon the 2nd, reviver of the dead"

"So, where we left off, as you said Double D, we're stuck in Japan with no means of returning home with no food, no water and zero shelter" concluded Eddy

"Looks that way, Eddy" Double D shrugged

"Well" said Eddy with a growing smirk on his face "Guess we'll have to make the most of it." Eddy grabbed the both of them and brought them down to his level. "This is it, boys. Finally, a clean slate for all of us, No Kevin, No Sarah, No Johnny and so forth and most of all No Kankers, OK, maybe it's a punch in the chest that Nazz isn't here either, but we will adapt, we will survive. Don't ya get it, Boys? Nobody here knows that we're here, nobody know that we're…we're…"

"…Unlikable, antisocial, clumsy…" Double D added

"…Sneaky." Ed finished off

"Yeah, Yeah, That's plenty. So…as no-one knows who we are" Eddy pondered as he rubbed his hands together. "We have a new species of pigeons to scam."

"Oh for the love of…" Double D sighed as he rised his head to the sky and put his hands to his face "Eddy, If we are going to be stuck here, I'd like to at least to meet someone who doesn't want to beat me to a pulp.

"Baby" taunted Eddy "Ed, what do you think?"

"But Eddy, I don't think. You should know, you told me last week." Said Ed

"Um…I'll take that as an agreement with me. Said Eddy triumphantly. "Hey, I take it that that's the high school of this joint"

Double D nodded. "Seems to be, perhaps it's within the best interest that we attend, for the time being" "_Maybe the school grounds may also contain a phone somewhere, I should call home to at least let everyone we're not dead"_ he thought

"Yeah, maybe we should" Agreed Eddy "Hey, do you think the chicks here well probably be cute"

"Oh, brother".

*10 minutes later*

The 3 Eds walked down the halls of the school that they had just now been enrolled into thanks to Double D. They had just left the School Office and were now all wearing the School's uniform, which was a white polo shirt, red tie, purple/grey jeans and a blue blazer with the school logo sewed onto the pocket.

"I hate new clothes" Eddy sulked, putting his hands in pocket.

"I love new clothes" laughed Ed.

"I have to say, I prefer Ed's attitude to yours, Eddy. Stop moping and try to make the best out of our situation". Said Double D

Just then, two girls walked by them. One of them had long dark green hair that went right down to her waist; the other had dark brown hair in a ponytail. Both of them glanced at Double D, whispered to each other and giggled as they continued to walk on. Double D blushed slightly and looked away.

"Ah, You must be the new students then"

The Eds turned round to face a woman with short brown hair, who looked in her mid-30s.

"I'm going to be your teacher for the rest of the remaining school year, follow me"

The Eds looked at each other nervously and follow her to their new classroom

As the bell rang to start the class, Kyon entered the classroom to take his seat, also noticing that Haruhi had already had taken her seat. He had nothing to discuss with her this morning and hope that she wouldn't start a conversation with something bizarre.

"Hey, Kyon"

"Unfortunately, Anything I ask for never comes true and if it does, I almost immediately regret it" he thought

Haruhi was shaking the back of Kyon's chair violently to get his attention, there was no doubt she was excited. She stopped and turned to face Kyon.

"There's been rumours' floating about this morning that there's been 3 new students spotted around the school grounds. Some say that they might even be foreign" said Haruhi with her trademark grin.

Kyon could have replied in many different ways, such as "Where on earth did you hear these rumours from exactly" or "We probably would have been informed ages ago if we were expecting new students in the school or even a simple "Who cares?". But before he could, the homeroom teacher walked into the classroom.

Following him into the classroom was…

…3 boys that Kyon had never met before in his life. "Damn" he thought "Once again, Haruhi was right"

The first one to enter was certainly the tallest and the strongest build out of the three. He had very short reddish hair and his skin tone was deeply yellow, although, Kyon did think he gave off a unhygienic sense off him. Odder still, the tall one had a mono-brow and he had no chin.

The second one to follow was of average height, wearing a hat-like item that Kyon had never seen before, poking from behind the hat were strands of slightly longish, black hair. He seemed to be very clean, and trim and whenever he smiled, his grin showed a gap between two of his teeth. He also did look a bit worryful and nervous, but not as much as Miss Asahina.

The final one to enter was short…very short. If his was a few inches shorter, people would think of him as a dwarf or someone with height limitations. He had 3 long blue strands of hair that looked like very thin flower stalks that had been violently blown back by a strong wind. He seemed to give off a negative attitude, probably to his painfully obvious grumpy, sulky face that would put Scrooge to shame.

"Well, You were right I'll give you that" whispered Kyon to Haruhi "They're certainly look like they not from around here.

"Yes, but why are they enrolling at this point in the school year" replied Haruhi suspiciously. "What was it a family matter…no, because it seems all three of them knows each other. Whatever it is, Haruhi Suzumiya, super-sleuth is going to figure it out." She smirked with her trademark grin"

**Tune in for the next chapter as the Ed's introduce themselves to the classes and What happens to Double-D…Find out next time and hopefully the next chapter will be up faster.**


	5. Contact has been Made

Chapter 5 – Contact Has Been Made

**Sorry about this, but due to countless spelling errors and f**k ups.I had to edit and re-upload this chapter. **

As the bell rang signalling the end of class and the start of lunch, everyone in the class started to pack-up and had for the cafeteria. The rain was pouring down heavily outside and the sky was dead grey, so no-one felt like eating outside or on the roof.

After everyone had left, the Ed's left the newly acquired classroom together. They decided to leave after everyone had left, so they could get a chance to talk amongst themselves. They had introduced themselves to the class and made up a phony story on why they transferred here which including something along the lines has being chosen as the top 3 students in the school to get the chance to transfer to a school in Japan for a certain period of time, and to their surprise no-one ridiculed, teased or humiliated any of them, instead they got approving looks and even a small applause.

Eddy was the first to talk as they exited the classroom

"Tell me again" said Eddy "How do these ear-pieces work again?"

He pointed to his left ear which has a device in it which a Bluetooth ear-piece but had 2 green lights blinking alongside each other.

"There're not just any old ear-pieces any more Eddy, They are wireless translation devices." Explained Double D. "You see, after we left I took a handful of Bluetooth headset pieces that I found and tinkered with the sound frequency enough so the English/Japanese language barrier is transcribed by a series of…"

"Added-on drivel" interrupted Eddy. "But how on earth did they understand us, we introduced ourselves in English and they seemed to have heard us."

"Umm, because the class learned the language on a previous occasion?" Double D questioned himself, "…no, that's too far-fetched. Hmmm, that's a mystery…give me some time and I'm sure I'll find an answer to that"

The Eds entered the lunchroom which was half-crowded for the moment. The three of them found a table and set down without getting any lunch.

"Hey Double D, did you see that girl in our classroom with the green hair, it was right down to her ankles, How cool was that, It's like she was Medusa from the Fantastic Four™ Comics." Said Ed

"I agree, Ed" replied Double D "It does seem to be the students in this school does seem to have perplexing hair styles, not to mention the colour. It's the colour spectrum exploded onto everyone. How odd"

"Odd?" questioned Eddy "You think this is odd, what about back home, what about Rolf, his hair looks a blue screen of death without the text. I don't know if that's common in the land of Nikky-Nakky-Noo or whatever the hell he comes from."

"You're one to talk Eddy, though it hardly noticeable, your hair is the same colour as… Double D spoke.

Eddy silenced Double D by grabbing his mouth tightly in his fist "I told you never to speak of that in the presence of others, didn't I tell you" he snarled as he let go of him. "But Double D's right, I mean Ed's head looks a freshly mowed lawn, Double D's doesn't even need explaining and even my one, two, three strands of hair is even classified as uncommonly unusual.

The three of them sat in silence at the table and the lunch hall grew more crowded by the second. Half a minute later, the silence was broken by the growl of Ed's Stomach.

"Double D, I'm hungry" said Ed sadly.

"I know, Ed, I know" comforted Double D. "But with money, no residence, and no current help at the moment, I'm afraid we're stranded. In fact, I'm going to look for a pay-phone and try to call someone in the Cul-de-sac, and hope that be able to find a way for us back home." Double D got out of his chair and straightened his hat and his uniform, "I meet you back in the classroom in about 40 minutes. Eddy, look after Ed, make sure he doesn't get into trouble or hurt or otherwise."

Double D walked away from the table and out of the lunchroom, all the while getting giggles and flirting stares of a group of girls sitting by the window.

"Great, why do I have to look after Mr Magoo here" grumbled Eddy, as Ed gnawed at his arm in hunger; which ended up coated in saliva.

Meanwhile in the SOS Brigade Room

Kyon was playing a game of othetto with Koizumi, to which he was trying to let Koizumi win for once, but damnit, Koizumi is too good at loser at this game. He looked round the room, to see Miss Asahina brewing her tea (scratch that, this is no ordinary tea, the water put in it is so good, Highland Spring Water imported for Scotland could not compare to it) and Nagato reading her book by the window in the corner, the book she was reading was titled "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest" by Ken Kesey

Kyon started thinking about what happened only minutes ago, Haruhi had rounded up every member of the brigade to discuss to everyone about the three mysterious exchange students; she had started by telling the other three about them and describing them with the help of crudely drawing each of the new students on a blank sheet of paper, as brilliant as Haruhi was, she was no Manet.

She then, talked to everyone about her suspensions about why the three of them suddenly appeared at this school with no previous mentioning during the past days and at this time of the year, then goes on to say…

"The first thing I suggest we do, is to capture one of them and force him to tell us of their intentions, I mean, The guy in the hat looks like he's always nervous, like he's hiding something" Haruhi deduced. "And as for the short one, he's got the crafty look in his eyes, I can definitely see it. So that the big guy, he must be the muscle of the group."

She stood up at the table, and slammed her hands down.

"Brigade members, these guys could be anybody, hoodlums, terrorists, maybe it's something even darker than we can think" said Haruhi.

Kyon was about to argue to Haruhi's point and say that she was over-exadurating and making a lot of fuss over nothing, when Koizumi bet him to it and also started suggesting that she recruit for the brigade as the addition of mysterious transfer students from **America** could attract more attention to the club.

"Way to go and throw fuel onto the fire Koizumi" Kyon thought

"Koizumi, its times like this I'm glad I made you second-in-command, Kyon, I hope you listening" scolded Haruhi. Kyon barely responded as he rolled his eyes

That's settled everyone. Prepare the clubroom for the newcomers, while I go out and see if I can't find one of them. I'll bring him back here no problem." Haruhi said confidently as walked towards the door with a grin on her face that would stop any trouble coming her way. "Won't be long" she called as she slammed the door shut.

Koizumi brought Kyon back to reality after finally admitting defeat of their board game. He smiled and looked up to Kyon

"Play again"

"No, not really, but there is something I want to ask you, Koizumi" replied Kyon as he clasped his hands together and brought his head down to their level. "What do you already know about these new students…the Americans?"

Koizumi stared at him for a few seconds with his grin still plastered on his face.

"Hardly anything, honestly" Koizumi shrugged. "All I know is they are not like Miss Nagato, Miss Asahina and I, they're all like you, complete normal"

"Then why do you support Haruhi in allowing these guys to join the club" said Kyon

"Company, I guess. I just thought it would be nice to have some fresh faces to talk too around here." smiled Koizumi. "And I sure that I'm not the only one who agrees" added Koizumi as he turned his head towards the window. Kyon followed suit as he noticed that Nagato has stopped her reading and he started listening in on their conversation.

"But I would much prefer it" continued Koizumi as he packed up the board game "if they do not find out about the secrets that reside in the clubroom include our hidden personas and Miss Suzumiya's God-like abilities, understand?" he finished, all the while still smiling

Kyon said nothing, as he sat there in utter confusion.

Kyon was starting for worry about the Eds and what horrors will Haruhi have to store for them.

It took a fair amount of time until Double D found a phone somewhere just outside the smaller buildings over the school campus.

"I think I'll call Johnny fist, seeing how he was one of the people that witnessed our accident" said Double D. He dialled his house phone number but then stopped midway. "Oh dear, this is a payphone…no money, even if I had a quarter it won't work…I'll just reverse the charges, since it's an emergency." He finished dialling the number and listened for it ringing

_Hi, you've the house of Johnny and my buddy, Plank. What that, Plank….Plank says your message after the beep, BWAHAHAHA!!!...*beep*_

"Drat" thought Double D. "Johnny, It's Double D. I'm calling to say we're safe and well. But unfortunally, we seemed to have ended up in Japan. Tell the others as soon as you can and we'll try to get home as soon as…*beep*. The phone line went dead.

Double D sighed, "Now all I can hope is that he'll get my SOS message.

"AHA, so you **have** heard about us already, and only within a day of being here."

Double D jumped with a start and straightened out like a ruler. He turned around to end up face to face with a brown short haired about his height, She wore a white and blue school uniform with a orange-red armband around her upper arm and a yellow ribbon is her hand. She wore a frown on her face and looked at him with a mixture of curiosity.

"C-c-c-can I h-help you?" Double D stuttered, as per usual, no matter where he ended up, his reactions to girls had not changed much.

The brown haired girl's frown lifted into a smile…then into a smirk. Double D started to sweat nervously and she raised her right hand to his face. Suddenly she grabbed his tie tightly in her fist.

"We haven't got a moment to lose, so you're coming with me, my decision is final!." She ordered and run off with Double D being dragged along in tow. His screams could be heard as they sped off down the corridors.

"EEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!"

**What ideas do Haruhi and the brigade have to push poor Double D to his limits? I don't know…I'll need to think about it.**

**The book Nagato was reading was a book that have just finished reading recently. "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" by Ken Kesey, if you have never read it or watched the movie based on it. I highly recommend it.**

**Nicky-Nacky-Noo is a fictional place, it does not exist…yet.**

**Any further questions?, feel free to comment or review. Thank You.**


	6. Interactions and Interrogations

Chapter 6 – Interactions and Interrogations

Eddy sat in the middle of the lunch hall, head in his hands as he looked around the room. He noticed that the lunch hall was more crowded than the one his school had back home and therefore it was noisier than what Eddy was used to. He grew irritated as well as impatient.

"Where the hell is Sock-head?" said Eddy. "He better not have gotten lost"

It didn't take Eddy very long to realise his question got no reply. He turned his head to the seat next to him to find that Ed had wandered off.

"Oh, come on" moaned Eddy,

"ED! Where are you, you Lummox" he called out in a kind of half whisper, half shout.

Suddenly, Eddy saw something, 2 tables away from him, 2 guys were chatting with each other at one of the tables closer to the window, the taller grey-haired one being the talkative one, while the shorter hazel-haired one was much quieter. But what caught Eddy's attention most of all was a giant tongue, snaking up from under the table unbeknown to the 2 guys still chatting as the tongue slipped underneath one of the trays of food on the table and retracted back under the table, as well as the tray and its contents.

"Uh, What a Freak" fumed Eddy as he sneaked under his table and stealthily made his way over to where Ed was, who was eating a container of rice and curry, but in Ed's standards in eating he pretty much just dumped the whole lot in his mouth in one big shove.

When Eddy made his way over to Ed, he lightly punched him on his shoulder. "Ed, don't go off without telling me, are you trying make me look bad by letting me talk to myself" Eddy whispered.

"I'm sorry, Eddy, But I was so hungry, I couldn't control myself" said Ed sorrowfully. "But don't worry Eddy; I left some over for you too." He used his foot to gently push over some of the food left on the tray over to where Eddy to kneeling.

"Well…I am kinda hungry, Apology accepted, big guy. Let's dig in" said Eddy

For the next minute or two they quietly ate their lunch underneath the tables, so as not to attract unwanted attention by noisily eating too loudly. Ed has ended his lot first after downing his desert, and as soon as he realised the food was gone. Ed's look was fulfilment quickly changed to concern.

"Eddy, I'm really starting to worry about Double D" whispered Ed

Eddy lightly belched into his fist and nodded "Me too, Ed". I suppose we better go and find him after all. Eddy replied. He turned and made his way through under the table with Ed behind him. But with Ed with him this time, it became less stealthily and became clumsier. A handful of students noticed chairs and tables banged and jolted, some heard voices that were lightly muffled by the clattering

*Bang*… "Dammit"

*creak….CLANK*

"Careful, Ed…".

Everyone tried to find what was making the noises by looking under the tables, but it's was too dark and cramped underneath to see, a few students could only see a dark huge green-coloured thing roaming about underneath the tables. They were so distracted by the noises coming from two different parts of the lunch-hall, they failed to notice the culprits crawling out at the corner end of the room.

Eddy turned towards Ed and smiled as he watched everyone looking under table and chairs. "Oh well, at least we weren't caught for once. Let's go, Ed!" said Eddy enthusiastically as the both of them leaving in a dash to search for their friend.

Taniguchi finished his conversation and was finally about to eat his…

"Hey, what happening took my chicken curry and butterscotch pudding?"

Kunikida sighed and sweat-dropped.

Meanwhile, halfway across the school…

Haruhi Suzumiya had completed her personal objective and was now heading back to the clubroom with Double D in tow. She was dragging him by his tie, so Double D was having a hard time matching her speed with his scrawny legs, trying his best not to trip up. His face was a mixture of confusion, exhaustation and fear and the sweat was pouring down his face. He tried to speak, but failed due to the rate he was breathing; he felt if he spoke, his lungs would probably implode so he stayed silent.

He was so tired; he never noticed when she stopped running which caused him to bump into her, which she barely felt. Haruhi glanced at Double D, he was trying to support himself as his legs were shaking and he looked like his was about to vomit.

"Huh, You don't do much exercise, don't you" huffed Haruhi

"I'll admit, that physical exercise is not my strongest skill, but was dragging me along really necessary.

Haruhi just frowned and grabbed his wrist before he had a change to run away, and opened the clubroom door in a big shout.

"SUCCESS!" she shouted as she stood in front of the doorway. Kyon, Koizumi, Mikuru and even Yuki watched as Haruhi stood there holding onto Double D's left wrist like he was her puppet.

Everyone, I caught one of them just outside the southwest wing next to the payphone." said Haruhi triumphantly. She stood there with her right hand raised in the air as a sign of accomplishment, still holding tightly onto Double D's wrist.

Double D looked around the room, it's was no bigger than his bedroom back home. The room had the normal contents any normal clubroom would have, tables, black and white boards, chairs, books and a computer at the desk in front of the window. Then they were stuff that Double D noticed as being out of place. To his right, he noticed a clothes rank like that used for school plays or something, it had hung on it a frog costume, nurse, maid, cheerleader and a bunny-girl appearance. The last item of clothing caught Double D off guard.

"Oh dear" he gulped, "I looks like this encounter is going to cause me more psychological damage than I anticipated." He thought. No matter which continent he was on, his approach to the female sex was just as shy and timid as anyways.

Double D felt his hand go limp and realized that the girl had ceased gripping on onto his wrist and began talking to everyone else.

"It was too easy to be believed" Haruhi said as she continued bragging. "He never even put up a fight or struggled, it was like taking candy from a baby".

"Poor guy, I can feel his pain" said Kyon. "So is this the newest member to your club, whether he likes it or not?"

"Our club Kyon, you're part of the club too you idiot" replied Haruhi "Secondly, I want to ask him a couple of questions first before I consider on making him a fully-fledged member.

"If he survives the interrogation" Kyon muttered under his breath.

Meanwhile Double D had slowly backed himself to the edge of the room next to the costume rack once Haruhi had let go of his wrist. She hadn't noticed him as she was too busy talking to the others.

"Oh dear, this is so perplexing. I haven't be this confused since that time I fell from a tree stark naked next to a boomerang wandering the sam hill was going on" thought Double D. "Why would they want to interrogate me, what have I done. I, well **we've** only just arrived here.

Haruhi then turned towards Double D and smirked. Double D felt a jolt of panic run through his body as she made her way towards him again.

"N-No, Please" pleaded Double D hysterically. "I-I haven't done anything to you.

Nevertheless she grabbed his arm once again and brought him towards to the club members. Everyone got out of the seats as Haruhi moved the furniture about to clear a space. She drew the curtains and took a chair and sat it in the middle of the room and forcefully made Double D sit on it before finally switching off the light, making it darker, but not enough to make everything unrecognisable.

Double D sat there in the dark quivering like a newly hatched bird, feeling unfamiliar faces glaring right at him. He would have preferred a pounded by Kevin over this at this moment he thought.

Haruhi paced the room a number of times like she was thinking, until she eventually walked to her desk where she removed a flashlight. She switched it on and shone it in Double D's face, causing him to cringe as his retina shrunk as the intense lights and shut his eyes in an instant.

"Alright" began Haruhi "We'll start with the easy stuff pal, what's your name".

"Edward" cried Double D, still shutting his eyes. "My name is Edward Walker" -not proven, Double D's last name here is for this story only

"Good, next question" continued Haruhi. "Where did originally you come from?"

Double D opened his eyes a touch "Peach Creek….Colorado"

"And the same goes for two friends, the big guy and the short one, who are they?"

"Well, the tall fellow is… wait a minute, you were in same classroom as us this morning. You've got the window seat at the back, surely you know our names, we introduced ourselves" Double D replied

Haruhi brought herself face to face with Double D, Her impatience hidden by the smile on her face. Kyon knew that Haruhi had enter Bad Cop Mode

"Listen _Edward_, You don't need to tell me I was there. I **know **I was there. I'm the one asking the questions, and I asked you your name to see if you were lying. I can tell when people are hiding something."

"If that were true" Kyon thought as he looked at Nagato, Asahina and Koizumi. "She would have caught on ages ago."

"But why would I lie about my who I am?" asked Double D

"Why **wouldn't** you lie?" Haruhi retaliated, "Here in a different country where no one knows who you are? You could become a different person all together if you wanted.

"But I'm not" said Double D "I've nothing to gain if I wanted to"

Haruhi paused and drew her face away from his. She walked towards the nearest table and sat on it cross-legged. "Fine, if that's the cause, then why did you transfer over here at this time in the school year and on such short notice? I talked to one of the teachers earlier and they were never given any notice before today about transfer students, let alone from Colorado, USA.

Double D's heart sank how he was going to explain their current predicament without being made suspicious by this hyperactive control freak. "She would never believe that we only got here by accident only because Ed ignorantly dug through to the other side of the earth." He thought.

"She could give the Kankers a run for their money, and strangely I'd like to see her try" he thought.

Meanwhile

Ed and Eddy were searching the hallways of the school looking for Double D. Ed was panicky and was a bit frantic.

"Double D?" he asked as he looked inside a trash can…

"Double D?" he asked as he looked into a backpack that was still currently being worn by its owner

"**Double D?"** he called out into a girls bathroom, to which a reply was made by a girlish scream and a loud *SMACK*.

Eddy walked over to Ed who now hand a pink bruise in the shape of a hand on his left cheek.

"This is why we should have cell-phones" complained Eddy. "But no-oooo… apparently cell-phones cost too much into the show's budget"

"Breaking the four walls again, Eddy" replied Ed rubbing his cheek with his sleeve"

"I swear, as soon as something interests him, BANG… he wanders off" said Eddy making a gun sign with his hand, causing Ed to comically duck for a moment. "Then you can't find him, he's a curious as a cat"

"Like the one that was killed" replied Ed.

"Yeah, well I guess we shouldn't worry too much, as scrawny as Sockhead is, his brains is more than a match for anyone, Peach Creek or Japan" said Eddy confidently.

He nudges Ed's chest with his elbow in a friendly manner. "C'mon Pal, Let's go find our Cat in the Hat"

"WHATCHAMAJIGGER" Ed shouts gleefully as he starts to run.

Suddenly, Ed's run was cut short as he slipped on something and fell onto his back causing the hall to shudder a bit. The object Ed had slipped on flew into the air and landed on Ed's chest. It was small, squashy and sickly yellow.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH" yelled Ed in shock He was now hovering in the air in shock, eyes outstretched (those who have seen the cartoon kind of get the picture). He leaped at Ed and held on the top of his head like a cat.

"Double D has been captured by the Relish people from 4th level of the underworld and worst of all" he pointed at the object now lying on the floor. "THEY REMOVED DOUBLE D'S BRAIN".** *1**

"And you'll be next if you don't get the heck of me" yelled Eddy struggling to remove Ed. "That's just Double D's stupid loofah, I repeat, why does he always carry around a…"

"NYAHAHAHA, you new guys are hilarious"

Ed and Eddy turned to where the laughter was coming from. In front of them was a girl with long knee-length dark-green hair. Whilst she was laughing fang like tooth could be seen from one side of the mouth.

"Get offa me, Ed" said Eddy throwing Ed off his head. "You're embarrassing me".

The girl's laughing finally started to calm down "Hey, are you guys lost?" she said

Eddy turned to face her, "Not really, we're trying to find our fr…"

Ed interrupted Eddy yet again. "Hey, I remember you; you're from our class this morning." Ed walked up to her with a big smile on his face. "Your hair is so cool, I've never met someone with green hair like yours and it's so long"

She giggled "Thanks, I'm quite good at styling hair and yes, it's a natural green. Your hair is pretty neat; you should let me style it sometime". Ed smile grew wider

Your name's Ed-san, right. My name is Tsuruya-san" she said as she bowed.

"You remembered my name from this morning?" said Ed

"Of course, you're the new exchange students from America, that's makes you guys megas-awesome" said Tsuruya

"You hear that Eddy" said Ed gleefully "We're megas-awesome" Ed started jumping up and down, with Tsuruya joining in too.

Eddy stood there confuzzled, "I never seen Ed connect with a girl this way. This place keeps getting weirder"

Tsuruya had stopped jumping and walked up to Eddy.

"And you're Eddy-san, aren't you" said Tsuruya

"Um…Yeah…I'm Eddy alright. Great to meet ya" said Eddy reaching out for hand-shake.

Tsuruya took his hand and shook it hard which took Eddy by surprise.

"Whoa, Your stronger than you look" replied Eddy, Tsuruya just tilted her hand and smiled, showing off her fang.

"Hey, where's your other friend? The one in the funny hat…um…Edward" asked Tsuruya momentarily remembering Double D's name.

"Who?" asked Eddy confused "Oh, Double D? Well, that's the thing. He went off to find a phone and now we can't find him. Just right now, we found his loofah, so he must've been here"

"Want me to help you, I know you layout of the school ya know" suggested Tsuruya

"Hang on" said Eddy "I've got an even better idea. ED!"

Ed galloped over towards Eddy "Yes, Eddy?"

"Heel…"

Ed sat on the ground like a dog, while Eddy walked over to him and held the loofah under Ed's nose.

"Get his scent, Fido" Eddy grinned.

"Ed sniffed and sniffed until…"Got it, Eddy"

"Great. Come on then Lumpy, let's follow that scent. Said Eddy

"Climb aboard" said Ed getting down on all fours like a house as Eddy climbed onto the back of his shoulders.

"Wanna come too, Tsuruya-san" said Ed

"Room for one more..." offered Eddy

"Are you kidding?" she smiled "I'm not letting you guys out of my sight, you're way too fun" She sat on Ed's back behind Eddy

"Please keep your arms and legs inside the lump at all times" announced Eddy

Ed reared upwards like a horse and sped off down the corridors shouting ""

"NYYYYYYOOOOOOORRRRRRROOO" cried Tsuruya.

**WOW...THINGS ARE STARTING TO GET COOKING NOW AREN'T THEY? *Sniff* Sniff* "No...Wait, That's my Dinner I smell. Nevertheless, hope everyone enjoy this long-awaited chapter and if there's any quotes, references or anything you'd like to see in future chapters. Don't be afraid to ask in the reviews section.**

***1 – Full Credit for that Quote belongs to Warlord-Xena**

**See You Soon -MentalHaggis**


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